Family

We had the opportunity and pleasure to have 2 major family events over the last several weeks. After missing so many things due to Covid lockdowns, various waves of lingering Covid, and packed schedules, it was wonderful to gather as a family once again. For me, the relative separation (yes – pun intended) was not as hard as it was for my wife as I come from a small family that didn’t get together often, while she comes from a large, close-knit family that frequently gathers. I am grateful to have been welcomed into her family right from the start, though I have to admit that even after all these years, it is still an adjustment for me after being brought up quite differently.

First up, was the marriage of one of our nieces. Making it extra special, my wife, an ordained minister in the Universal Life Church, performed the ceremony (her second time as she also performed the ceremony for her god-son last year). She did a fantastic job, and everything went smoothly.

It was a small gathering of the bride’s and groom’s families, and a chance to see some family members who are not usually present at the informal get-togethers. That included the bride’s younger brother who is stationed in Washington state in the army. We had not seen him in several years and were all greeted with huge hugs. He was so happy to be back with family again after so long and was looking forward to spending a few days with his sisters and nieces and nephew.

My brother-in-law and I were surprised to hear him tell us how he remembered us taking him to the ballfield near our homes then going for cheesesteaks at a local pub more than 10 years ago. He recounted several such memories of times with his uncles (all of them, not just the 2 of us) when he was “a kid”. It’s amazing how the little things we do with children are remembered and what impact even the smallest gesture or phrase can have. There’s a lesson there to be mindful in the present because kids capture what you say and do.

The second event came a couple of weeks ago when 2 of our nieces graduated from college. One with her Masters degree (with Distinction), and the other with her Bachelors degree. There is a big party scheduled to celebrate their achievements but one of the aunts planned a gathering at her home to give the family time to celebrate together. She dug up photos of the girls from various times as they grew up (yes, she has actual hard-copy photos) and made a collage out of her dining room table, which provided for a lot of reminiscing.

During the celebratory champagne toast, aunts and uncles took turns congratulating the girls on their accomplishments, sharing thoughts and memories, and wishing them much success and happiness. The girls then took the stage to thank their mom, aunts, and uncles for helping to get them to where they are now. It was heart-warming to hear and see the pride everyone has in them and in the family, and to hear the girls express their gratitude and understanding of how much family contributed to their achievements – and will contribute to their future successes. I am grateful to be part of it.

Again, there’s a lesson here that kids absorb what the adults around them say and do. And the closer those adults are to them the bigger the influence. Some of that influence led to a few funny stories shared around the table that night, and the realization that we elders need to be mindful no matter how old the “youngens” are, as what we say and do will always be absorbed.

All 5 of our nieces and our 2 nephews have turned out to be the kind of people we are all proud of. While they all came equipped to succeed, family support and the examples provided by us elders have given them an even stronger foundation to build from. Now they’ve joined in the responsibility as the next generation is watching and listening to them too.

I am taking next week off for Memorial Day so next post will be week of 6/5.

I hope you all get to enjoy the long holiday weekend.

www.RetiredandInspiredat55.com 5-22-2023